not mine. hers.

she started smsin recently... n last nite i was trainin hard, juz so i can do beautiful kicks 4 cca maze. i know she'd go n support him. n i know t i wana impress her. dint wana go offline e nite b4. was talkin 2 silvia n sendin her spastic pics. but in e end i did slp, at 1+.

woke up at 625 w an achin body. did 2 many pull-ups n overused my unconditioned 'wings'. after gettin dressed, i had a lil breakfast n headed 4 sch. i'm gona impress her 2day =)

i started stretchin n playin ard. cca maze was supposed 2 start at 830 but in the end it started at 11. e kids flooded in n performances started. she was there, always lookin at him. whenever she saw me she wldnt botha or juz hide away. n she smsed me she'd pretend e othas were actin w air. hurt, obviously stabbed me. i'd make sure i outperform him. n so i gave it my all, wowin e crowd of kids. there were a few flaws of lil practice which we acted 2 cover up quite well. she only looked at him. i took a peek at her whenever i cld. she's stil so pretty n she dressed pretty koo 2day. her silky black hair flew across her radiant n rosy face. i wish i cld even talk 2 her...

e kids wld flow in soon n i wanted my hair up n fiery. i brought all my diff type of gels n wax up 2 e tkd room. had som fun stylin hair n makin noise. after we went outside we encountered miss. joanna lee, a teacher, n a teacher's son. seein i was frm tkd, e teacher asked if i'd show e kid som trix. i gladly told e kid i was gona fly. such cuteness was e kid. i did a 540 n jumpin ereverse 2 split which left e kid smilin. then lan jun cam out in his camo n did som poses 4 e kid. soon after a lil crowd formed, all smilin at e cute kid. we made quite som noise n got chased away by mr.wong =P

then i took 2 my gear. i was next up w choong. e seniors wldnt let us spar wout e paddin. when we practiced last wk under jack sir we dint hav 2 wear t uncomfortable shit. i wasnt even allowed 2 use my blue head gear. wad utter stupidity. so i stepped in2 e ring w choong, where we bowed n took our stances, each givin a loud cry. i looked her a last time, smiled in my heart, then turned firece n concentrated on e combos i wld do 2 wow e kids. i did most of e tauntin n so he charged in. 360's came out whenever possible n somtimes we were 2 close to even kick. he hit me several times w kicks t looked like flashes n i retaliated w kicks t scraped his face. i wanted 2 take e performance higher n incoporated jumpin kicks. 1 was countered with a snap to my left inner thigh but did not falter my advances. after some tauntin footwork i jumped in high 4 a punch 2 e face. he did a 360 back thrust, connectin w my... ok... lil bratha. as i landed. an unimaginable pain seared thru my bratha n i fell 2 e grd. e stupid referee asked me weter i was ok. how wld a guy wout groin guard gettin thrust kicked in his bratha cld take it? dam. i was taken out e ring n helped by a sch sir. i tink she muz hav seen it... wel her wish did COME TRUE, lethal 2 an extent... i was abt 2 cry soi went to take off my paddin n sat outside e hall. dam... i felt weak all over. i had disgraced e club. kids n parents were scared off. n i'm sure she'd tink i suck.

i performed e nxt few time, givin it all i got. my body wld let me do e moves but i gave it all. variations had 2 appear but e show stil ended w e crowd clappin. i was honored 2 be e centre of attraction, a nerd kid gettin bullied but in e end, 'whackin e crap' outa e 3 bullies. when i had e time i'd look at her discreetly, tryin 2 nurse my bleedin heart but instead feeling more hurt. i worked so hard... n she wont even look. i can do tings he cant. i've made tis art my life, doin my bez 2 perfect e mind n body. i juz got ignored. whenever i saw her ard i'd go n show e few kicks. when my balls were ok i got choong out 4 sparrin. we did it WOUT PADDING. n even mr.lim, our cca teacher, commented it was more beautiful than e padded sparrin. choong n i threw forceful but beautiful kicks. i jumped n reversed like no 2mr, only in hope she'd even watch... they werent perfect but gd enuf. we cld do beta combos then padded. after som hurt seein t she had hidden herself, i went downstairs w choong n e othas 2 do som madness.

after i went up, i saw jian cheng, my bro. i wasnt 2 let him miss my performance tis time. gettin authorisation gfrm jack sir, i got e '3 gangsters' 2 act e scene w me again. gor sat on e chair n njoyed e show of kicks, locks n a few humorous parts, juz like e past 5 times we had acted. i'm hapi i dint allow him 2 miss my performance 2 yrs in a row.

i changed n headed 4 e tkd room 2 reclaim my hair stufs. after t i went out. i walked 2 her but she turned ard, pretendin not 2 know me. i called out n she replied. not reli havin anythn 2 say, i juz offered her choc muffins. she juz rejected them n i went away. i brought them cuz i know she'd usually miss breakfast juz 2 come see him.

then she, he me, n othas walked out. i watched jealously as she bounced ard him hapily. she was playful w him yet so cold 2 me... i tried 2 block e hurt but only 2 look up n see them holdin hands. they aint even 2geter... we all took buz 100. i dint wana sit blose 2 e back cuz they were there. i did play w sampson n choong pingpong ball along e journey, so i wldnt hear her. they were obviously havin their sweet hapi time like couples do. at e terminal i left n took bus 82.

y? Y? do i deserve such crap? she doesnt know n wldnt even botha 2 care... i'm limpin, tired, strained, stabbed, juz so she can smile n look at him, play w him n be w him. yeah she dint botha abt my existence unless she nds som1 2 sms... but i tried so hard.

y dun she juz stab me 2 death? or mayb not... i wana live my promise. i stil am. after a year. i dun plan 2 stop, but juz drown myself til i can see her msg on my hp, hear her voice or even see her, again.

i'll continue, wont back down. n i wish her wish dint come true.